People said that everyone belong to a place
A place where people called family gather
A place where you can hear laughter
A place that called home
If it's true, can you show me where I belong?
Can you show me who's my family?
Can you show me where's my family so I could hear their laugh?
Can you show me where's my home?
Monday, June 27, 2011
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Second Day (Part Two)
Okay... my brother and I finally came at peace and we watch movies to make it up. Everything went pretty well UNTIL I get back to my aunt place. My cousin ask me if I want a tiramisu (which now I wish I never take) because he want to take the container. I say yes and start eating it. I told him that I'm gonna eat that up for him but he has to be the one who wash the container because I'm not the one who one it. He said YES for that one.
And when I finally finished eating that cursed tiramisu, I gave him the container and start working with my shoes. It seems like he gave it to her ma than she left it unwashed in the sink. He started to pissed and yell at her ma. And her ma blame him. Then he blame me for not washing the container because I'm the one who eat the tiramisu. I was pissed because he blame me for that. Hey, I won't be mad if it's really my fault, but he said that he's the one who gonna wash it!
And when I started to get pissed, his ma came to the room that I use (the only safe place in this hell hole she called home), and start saying that I didn't love her son and her son become a brat because of me! WHAT THE HELL?! I was really surprised that time.
Well... he's a spoiled brat from the beginning, AND THAT'S HIS PARENTS FAULT! It's so not fair that I always have to be the one who get blame. I might be 16 now and it means that I have to be mature. LIKE HELL I WOULD CARE! I am mature in my own way.
This is so not fair. When I act maturely, people start saying that my parents have taken my childhood. But when I act childishly, people start yelling at me telling me to grow up. What are they really want?
Around them, I could never be who I really am. With my family around, being me is almost impossible. I could only be me in front of my friends in comic rent and some others in other cities.
They might not realize what they've done to me, because they didn't really care about me. They might not realize so much pain that they caused, because they are no where near me. They might think that I'm strong, because I always have the smile and the laughter.
But the truth? I'm bleeding inside. Doesn't matter how much tears I've shed, the pain won't go away. The pain that they caused are so great that it doesn't matter how loud I scream, the pain would still hurt me real bad. I've run as fast as I could, but the pain still there.
It's just hurt for not being able to be who we really are. But it'll hurt even more when you realize that you don't even know who you are. It's just hurt...
And when I finally finished eating that cursed tiramisu, I gave him the container and start working with my shoes. It seems like he gave it to her ma than she left it unwashed in the sink. He started to pissed and yell at her ma. And her ma blame him. Then he blame me for not washing the container because I'm the one who eat the tiramisu. I was pissed because he blame me for that. Hey, I won't be mad if it's really my fault, but he said that he's the one who gonna wash it!
And when I started to get pissed, his ma came to the room that I use (the only safe place in this hell hole she called home), and start saying that I didn't love her son and her son become a brat because of me! WHAT THE HELL?! I was really surprised that time.
Well... he's a spoiled brat from the beginning, AND THAT'S HIS PARENTS FAULT! It's so not fair that I always have to be the one who get blame. I might be 16 now and it means that I have to be mature. LIKE HELL I WOULD CARE! I am mature in my own way.
This is so not fair. When I act maturely, people start saying that my parents have taken my childhood. But when I act childishly, people start yelling at me telling me to grow up. What are they really want?
Around them, I could never be who I really am. With my family around, being me is almost impossible. I could only be me in front of my friends in comic rent and some others in other cities.
They might not realize what they've done to me, because they didn't really care about me. They might not realize so much pain that they caused, because they are no where near me. They might think that I'm strong, because I always have the smile and the laughter.
But the truth? I'm bleeding inside. Doesn't matter how much tears I've shed, the pain won't go away. The pain that they caused are so great that it doesn't matter how loud I scream, the pain would still hurt me real bad. I've run as fast as I could, but the pain still there.
It's just hurt for not being able to be who we really are. But it'll hurt even more when you realize that you don't even know who you are. It's just hurt...
Second Day (Part One)
Second day being 16 is nothing than more than a disaster. My brother are currently yelling at me, telling me to use my brain. The reason is because I want to go to jakarta today. And there must be traffic jam if I insist. But does he has to yell at me like that?
Saturday, June 18, 2011
16 Years
16 years ago I was born,
16 years I've seen the world
16 years has passed,
But I haven't find the true happines
16 years old I am now,
The year where I have to be mature
16 years of laughing,
16 years of crying
16 years with joy and happiness,
16 years with pain and sadness
16 years of my live,
16 years of my story
16 years I've seen the world
16 years has passed,
But I haven't find the true happines
16 years old I am now,
The year where I have to be mature
16 years of laughing,
16 years of crying
16 years with joy and happiness,
16 years with pain and sadness
16 years of my live,
16 years of my story
Not-so-happy B'day
Yesterday there was some sort of farewell party in my school and I have to be the MC. So, I have to stay in school from 8 a.m. The party it self start at 5.30 p.m. Pretty tough, huh? Well the teacher allow me to go home for about 1 hour to prepare my self for the party. Knowing that my aunt place is way to far, I decided to go to my comic rent so I can take a bath.
Maybe it sounds kinda weird, but that's the truth. Well, since i'm a gamer, I didn't need a lot of time to take a bath and prepare my self. I think it only take around 15 minutes to do it. Since I still have around 45 minutes left, I decided to continue my game. For some people, playing game for 45 minutes may seems awkward. But as a gamer, 45 minutes will be a waste if you didn't use it to play.
Anyway, when the clock strike at 4 p.m. I have to head back to school. The party has not start yet, but I have to be there for a quick meeting.
When the party started, first thing that crossed in my mind is i'm dead. I'm so dead. That's because I have the whole stage for my self and I was way to nervous to think about what I should say. In other word, last night is really a mess. And the party that supposed to end at 9.30 p.m. somehow ended up at 10.30 p.m. It might be a mess, but somehow I enjoy it.
I'm tired and I didn't have enough sleep. And just to make it worse, my friend text me in the middle of the night.
I was starting to pissed of that time, but then when I read the text, that anger is gone. That's just a short text. Saying a happy b'day. At that time, all the bad things seems like nothing. All I could feel is a warm fuzzy feeling in my heart. And even though I hate to be waken in the middle of the night, that one is really special.
Well, I have to be waken 4 times in a row for the same kind of message.
It's pretty obvious that I ain't got enough sleep cause when I wake up, my head is pounding pretty hard. But since I got a test, I have no choice except to in out there and live my life. Done with the test, i'm heading to my comic rent to play Kingdom Heart 2. I somehow manage to finish it before the sun set. But before I could celebrate it, my brother call and practically yelling at me to get to the hotel because my aunt want to celebrate my bday.
And after that, everything is practically ruin. Stripper's mom keep joking around about stuff. Saying that i'm not supposed to put that kind of face on my bday.
Like hell I would listen to her! How am I supposed to put an un-annoyed face when i'm annoyed! And she just way to dense to realize that she's the reason why I look so annoyed.
And that's conclude my not-so-happy bday!
Maybe it sounds kinda weird, but that's the truth. Well, since i'm a gamer, I didn't need a lot of time to take a bath and prepare my self. I think it only take around 15 minutes to do it. Since I still have around 45 minutes left, I decided to continue my game. For some people, playing game for 45 minutes may seems awkward. But as a gamer, 45 minutes will be a waste if you didn't use it to play.
Anyway, when the clock strike at 4 p.m. I have to head back to school. The party has not start yet, but I have to be there for a quick meeting.
When the party started, first thing that crossed in my mind is i'm dead. I'm so dead. That's because I have the whole stage for my self and I was way to nervous to think about what I should say. In other word, last night is really a mess. And the party that supposed to end at 9.30 p.m. somehow ended up at 10.30 p.m. It might be a mess, but somehow I enjoy it.
I'm tired and I didn't have enough sleep. And just to make it worse, my friend text me in the middle of the night.
I was starting to pissed of that time, but then when I read the text, that anger is gone. That's just a short text. Saying a happy b'day. At that time, all the bad things seems like nothing. All I could feel is a warm fuzzy feeling in my heart. And even though I hate to be waken in the middle of the night, that one is really special.
Well, I have to be waken 4 times in a row for the same kind of message.
It's pretty obvious that I ain't got enough sleep cause when I wake up, my head is pounding pretty hard. But since I got a test, I have no choice except to in out there and live my life. Done with the test, i'm heading to my comic rent to play Kingdom Heart 2. I somehow manage to finish it before the sun set. But before I could celebrate it, my brother call and practically yelling at me to get to the hotel because my aunt want to celebrate my bday.
And after that, everything is practically ruin. Stripper's mom keep joking around about stuff. Saying that i'm not supposed to put that kind of face on my bday.
Like hell I would listen to her! How am I supposed to put an un-annoyed face when i'm annoyed! And she just way to dense to realize that she's the reason why I look so annoyed.
And that's conclude my not-so-happy bday!
Thursday, June 16, 2011
First, Second, Third, and...
O...kay...
Let me tell u a story about a girl who have to stay with her aunt.
Once upon a time, in the eastern side of Bandung, there lived a girl who have to live with her aunt. No, her parents is still alive. You be wondering why she had to live with her aunt. The reason is actually pretty simple. She moved to Bandung in order to continue her study to a higher degree. And since she barely 15 when she moved to Bandung, she has no choice except to stay with her.
As the day went by, her live starting to get worse...Her belonging that she bought with the money that she has. First a RAZER Moray headset (400k IDR), second her V-Pet (350k IDR), third Memory card for PS 2 (not even close to 60k IDR), and the last one is her Oral-B toothbrush (LESS than 20k IDR).
Live is not so fair for her. But there's nothing that she can do. She's beg the God but there's nothing happened. Day passed and nothing had change. Until one day, her father came and told her to move out with her brother.
BUT WILL IT BE POSSIBLE???
Let me tell u a story about a girl who have to stay with her aunt.
Once upon a time, in the eastern side of Bandung, there lived a girl who have to live with her aunt. No, her parents is still alive. You be wondering why she had to live with her aunt. The reason is actually pretty simple. She moved to Bandung in order to continue her study to a higher degree. And since she barely 15 when she moved to Bandung, she has no choice except to stay with her.
As the day went by, her live starting to get worse...Her belonging that she bought with the money that she has. First a RAZER Moray headset (400k IDR), second her V-Pet (350k IDR), third Memory card for PS 2 (not even close to 60k IDR), and the last one is her Oral-B toothbrush (LESS than 20k IDR).
Live is not so fair for her. But there's nothing that she can do. She's beg the God but there's nothing happened. Day passed and nothing had change. Until one day, her father came and told her to move out with her brother.
BUT WILL IT BE POSSIBLE???
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Score
Okay, exams is almost over and I still haven't got any will to open my book and start studying. It's always like that since the first day. Tomorrow is the last day and I still have no will. People call me weird for that. I mean for not studying for the exams. Hey, no offense, but what's the point of studying stuff that you didn't even want and need at all?
You might be wondering about my score. To be honest, they're not as bad as I imagine. As far, math is the worst one. I only manage to get 62 in that. And I kinda surprise that I manage to get 94 in the local language study. I mean, I'm not even from this place and I manage to get the highest score in my class? GET REAL!
When I got the result. I was so shock that I had to smack my self to make sure that I'm not dreaming. And when I said I smack my head, I really mean it.
Anyway... I gotta go now.
I'll post another post about my usual live as soon as possible.
BYE!
You might be wondering about my score. To be honest, they're not as bad as I imagine. As far, math is the worst one. I only manage to get 62 in that. And I kinda surprise that I manage to get 94 in the local language study. I mean, I'm not even from this place and I manage to get the highest score in my class? GET REAL!
When I got the result. I was so shock that I had to smack my self to make sure that I'm not dreaming. And when I said I smack my head, I really mean it.
Anyway... I gotta go now.
I'll post another post about my usual live as soon as possible.
BYE!
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