Well, I got back from Makassar yesterday. Flying to Jakarta then go straight to Bandung. But that's not the important part.
What really matter is what happened today.
So, yeah. I was way too lazy to go to school today, so I skipped it and decided to come after school to get some sort of tutoring for the research project.
When my tutoring is done, I, like most of the time, am starving. Deciding that some of my friends might order something to eat, I went up stair and it's a bingo.
They do have a bucket of fried chicken. After eating, we kinda have a little forum. In that forum, we discussed about stuffs that has been bothering us. Stuffs that have relations with our friends in school.
So one thing leads to another, we moved to my class since it's pretty dark right now. We continue our topic and have no problem at all.
When we decided it's dark enough and probably the time to go home, my friend turn of the light and one of them climbed the table and start talking.
About someone they met in the 10th grade. The first time they knew about this person is when he saw the picture that that person drew. Judging from that, they considered that person as someone who loves anime and comics, which turns out to be true.
Since that person is getting close to their best friend, they realize that that person is an easy going one and they enjoy being with that person.
Suddenly, they cut of their story and turn to me, asking, "will u go out with me?"
Surprised, shock, awkward, glad, and happy. That's what I felt that time. But I can't bring myself to say yes, knowing that I'll probably hurt him if I said that. Not because I didn't like that person, but more because I still can't understand myself. What I really want. I'm afraid, saying yes will only cause something that I'd regret.
I don't want to lose anyone anymore. Not again, not ever.
